New start

I had a nervous breakdown on Friday after being sent home early with a fever.  I came to the realization the work environment I’m in is not healthy for me, mentally or physically.

I finished working on a concept book for my story that I’ll be passing out during NYCC. I’m very scared because I’m about to start a very important chapter in my life, one that I’ve been pushing away and denying. But I’m going to focus on my writing. It makes me truly happy. I can’t stand having to work to just “support myself” when I know it’s bs.

I feel like I’m going to disappoint a lot of people at work by leaving but I don’t want to half ass work because I don’t enjoy it. And I feel like I’m doing a disservice by not being my best in that environment. I had a mental breakdown on Friday while laying in bed with a fever and realized “the fuck am I doing? I’m fucking miserable”. While I am going to miss the job I’m also not going to guilt myself for not sticking it through the year. I feel as if I did the best I could given the situations occurring.

I’m so excited and driven to finish my story, it’s now or never.

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